...And We're Off!

In less than 24 hours, we will be well on our way to Ethiopia!  My sister Katy will be posting for us while we're away...  We are soooo excited and ready!

With love,
Sarah & Jeremy

CONFIRMED TRAVEL DATE!!!! :)

Just a quick post to let you all know that we received an official CONFIRMED travel date for our adoption week today.  That said, Jeremy and I have decided to travel early to learn more about our children's birthplace and culture.  Here are some important dates to know:

• December 30th - Jeremy and I leave for Ethiopia!
• January 15th - We meet our kids for the first time
• January 20th - We have an embassy appointment to get the kids' immigrant visas
• January 24th - We return home - all FIVE of us!  :)

We're SOOO excited.  To top it all off, today was the last day of work for both of us until we travel.  So much to do!

Melkam Lidet Hirut!

Happy 9th Birthday, Hirut!  We wish we could be there to celebrate with you, but we'll see you soon.  :)

Melkam Lidet Binyam!

Our little boy Binyam turns three today.  Happy Birthday Binyam!

P.S.  Many people have been asking for updates.  There is so much to say, yet I don't have time to share it all now.  Look for soon-to-come updates of the amazing children's shower we had last week with our family.  As for our traveling plans... To make a long story short:  We're waiting for the U.S. government to pass our paperwork to the Ethiopian embassy so we're not likely to travel as soon as we thought.  When our agency gets confirmation that the embassy in Ethiopia has it, we can get a confirmed travel date.  At this point, we don't expect to hear for a few weeks, and we think we'll be traveling sometime in January.  :)

Birth Certificates, Tentative Travel Dates, and Minivans, Oh My!!!

I know it's been a while...  What can I say?  We've been busy!!!!  :)  All of those things that we have been putting off "until we pass court" are now needing to get done.  The good news is that we're doing a TON of it!

But, for now, I'm just going to share three pieces of news from our lives:

1.  We received the kids' Ethiopian birth certificates via email last Thursday.  This allows the next steps to happen:  Ethiopian passports for the kids, medical clearances for U.S. immigration purposes (i.e., their visas), and then a confirmed travel date!

2.  On Friday, we received a (very) tentative travel date from our agency.  If all goes as planned, we will arrive at the agency's guesthouse in Ethiopia on December 31st.  Again, if everything goes as planned, we would meet the kids on New Year's Day.  I LOVE that.  Of course, Jeremy and I want to travel around Ethiopia before we meet the kids, so we'll probably leave sometime before then.  We'll know more after the kids pass their medical clearances in a few weeks. 

3.  As of yesterday, Jeremy and I officially own a mini-van!  Because we have 3 car seats to accommodate (yes, THREE!), our RAV4 wasn't going to work.  As a result, we are now proud owners of a Toyota Sienna.  I think my favorite feature so far is that I can change the radio stations and volume from our steering wheel...  so fun!

That's all for now...  Hopefully, we'll have more news later this week!

Melkam Lidet Helen!

Though we can't celebrate your birthday with you in person this year, know that we're thinking of you today and every day.  Best birthday wishes to you!

Happy 6th Birthday, Helen!

Introducing Our Daughters and Son!!!

We are thrilled to announce that we PASSED court today!!!! We are officially the parents of our beautiful children according to the Ethiopian government. What an amazing day!

Introducing Hirut, Helen, and Binyam!!!

The Rollercoaster Continues...

Our court case was postponed again today, with no reason given. Our agency thinks that it might be because the court had too many cases scheduled today. I'm feeling sad and frustrated about that, but there is good news: Our court date was rescheduled for tomorrow. Hopefully, the third time is a charm! The other good news is that at least 3 other Nazret families passed court today. I'm sooo excited for them and hope we join them tomorrow :)

Postponement with a Silver Lining

I kind of knew it was too good to be true. Every time I told someone about our "court date", my intuition told me to say, "first court date" instead. And then, at 2 o'clock this morning, I woke up suddenly, and I just knew it. And so it is. Our court case has been postponed. No reason was given to our adoption agency to explain why, but it's not unusual for families to be scheduled for multiple court cases before they pass.

At the same time, I feel really lucky. I feel lucky because our court case was rescheduled for October 28th, less than a week away. PLUS, that's the same court date as the other Nazret families I know, so I think this probably increases our chances of traveling together. I would LOVE that.

So, while I'm definitely disappointed, I'm also thankful. And I'm hopeful that our families will be together before we know it!!! (A girl can dream, can't she?)

Mark your calendars - October 28th is going to be a big day!!!

Twenty-Seven Weeks and Two Days Later

It’s been twenty-seven weeks and two days since we received our referral, and today we were F-I-N-A-L-L-Y assigned a court date in Ethiopia! Not only that, but it’s for THIS THURSDAY!!!! Thursday, October 22^nd!

This is a HUGE step for us, and one that we’ve been waiting for since our referral. Most families with our agency who were matched with their children in April (like us) have already traveled, so this is a BIG step forward. It’s PROGRESS.

We don’t travel to Ethiopia for this court date; our adoption agency takes care of this part of the process in country for us. So, if everything goes smoothly, we will legally be the parents of Hirut, Helen, and Binyam according to the Ethiopian government on October 22nd. We should hear by 12 noon (Central Time) on Thursday if all goes well.

At this point, we think we’ll be traveling in December (again, if everything goes smoothly). We are SOOOO excited!!!

Thanks for sharing in this journey with us!

Much love,

Sarah & Jeremy

It's a Small World After All!

When I was around 11 years old, my parents took our family to Florida to go to Disneyworld. I remember a few things about that trip... Because it was freezing (for Florida), our first stop was to the gift store to buy matching Mickey Mouse hoodies. I remember loving Epcot Center where we could learn about different countries. Another thing that stuck with me was the ride, "It's a Small World". In particular, I remember having the song in my head for the next year!

In the last few days, that song has occupied my mind once again. This time, it's not because of Disneyworld, but because of some amazing connections I have made in the last week.

Many of you know that our children are in an orphanage in Nazret, Ethiopia. According to our agency, very few adoptive families here are matched with children there... around 10 or so.

Since May, I've known of only one other family who has a child there. It has been wonderful to connect with her regularly about each of our families' progress (or lack thereof). I can't imagine waiting all of this time without someone like her!

Ever since we connected, the two of us have been searching for others who have children in the same place. That's why I find it AMAZING that, in this last week alone, we have connected with at least THREE more families with children currently in the same orphanage in Nazret!

Even though all of our families are spread all over the country, this is an incredible opportunity for our children to stay connected with kids they already know.

To all of the families with whom I've connected, THANK YOU for reaching out!

What to Write?

I struggle sometimes with this blog, not knowing what to write. Should I write about the long list of things we're doing to get ready for our children to come home? Do you want to hear about attachment and what it means for our family? What about our recent paperwork updates? Or would you rather I teach you some words and phrases in our children's first language of Amharic? Should I show you my latest attempt at cornrows and bantu knots? Should I tell you more about the latest Ethiopian dinner I prepared? Or should I tell you what I know about the recent Ethiopian holiday this past weekend called Meskel?

Many of you probably wonder, "Is there any news?" No, there is no big news. We are still waiting for the Ethiopian courts to re-open so that a court date can be assigned to our family. The latest rumor (as of today) is that courts are set to re-open in mid-October, but until it actually happens, I'm not holding my breath...

Melkam Addis Amet!

Today, people in Ethiopia celebrate Enkutatash, Ethiopian New Year. It's the first day of 2002! They are on a different calendar than we are in the United States. Click here for more information. To celebrate, Jeremy and I are going to an Ethiopian restaurant for dinner! Happy New Year (or Melkam Addis Amet)!

Updates!

Just a very quick note to say that, after 5 months of having a referral, we received our first measurement updates on each of the kids' heights, weights, and head circumferences. The most recent one was from just a few days ago. It's sooo great to see that they are growing! Now, I want to get out the tape measure again... :)

Progress!

This morning we found out that our MOWA letter has not only been written, but it was also SIGNED today! Now the CHSFS in Ethiopia is in the process of submitting our documents to the court registrar. Because courts are closed right now, we will be assigned a court date when they re-open in October, but CHSFS thinks we have a good chance of getting a court date in the first few weeks of October. This is the PROGRESS we've been waiting for!!! :) :) :)

Making Lemonade

There's not much in the way of adoption news. Though almost all of the families with children from our kids' orphanage have now received court dates (including the other family we were visualizing for - YAY!), we're one of two families still waiting for one. It'll happen when it's supposed to happen, I guess. There's nothing we can do about it.

With all of this extra time on our hands before traveling to Ethiopia, Jeremy and I have decided to live it up. In that spirit, here are pics from our last-minute trip to the Grand Canyon, Bryce Canyon, and Zion National Park this past weekend! Everything was breathtakingly beautiful and we had a great time.

Jeremy and Sarah at the Grand Canyon in Arizona

Jeremy and Sarah at Bryce Canyon in Utah

Sarah in the Narrows of Zion


Jeremy on the Zion - Mt. Carmel Scenic Highway


Jeremy in the Narrows at Zion National Park


Sarah Hiking the Narrows at Zion National Park

Imagining...

It's really fun going through our activities and imagining what life is going to be like when our 3 little ones come home.

This weekend, for example, we were camping out-of-town with our extended family. Throughout the whole weekend, I kept thinking about how our kids would interact with my cousins' kids, how this will probably be the last family camping trip where I'll be sleeping in, and how everything is going to change when I officially become a mother.

I can't wait!

Sarah

Mixed Feelings...

Here's a post for those of you who are following our ever-changing timeline. I can hardly keep track of it myself...

The jist of it is this: Our timeline has been extended again. We will likely meet our children by the end of the year. We'll be lucky if we meet our children by Thanksgiving.

Why the delay? Well, we still don't have our MOWA letter (though our agency expects it by next week), so we still don't have a court date. Our agency is now expecting that our court date will happen after the Ethiopian courts re-open in October. After our children pass court in Ethiopia, the adoption is final, but we won't be able to meet them for another 6-8 weeks (lots of logistics need to be worked out before we arrive).

Our feelings are mixed. Of course, we're upset that our children will have to wait without a family for another few months, and we're sad for ourselves that we can't yet share our lives with our children. We miss our children like crazy and we haven't even met them yet! How are we going to make it through another few months??? That said, I feel some sense of relief because I know when (approximately) we'll meet our kids. I'm a planner, and now I can plan the next few months with some sense of certainty. That part of it feels good. Again, our feelings our mixed.

To keep ourselves occupied, we've been doing all sorts of things lately: learning more Amharic (our children's native language), preparing photo albums for our family, organizing our house for kids, writing the life histories of our children in a story format (it's called a "lifebook"), and attempting to cook more Ethiopian food. More to come on some of these topics soon!

Things are Looking Up!

So, the rumor I feared turned out to be true, but now there is so much good news coming in, that I'm not too worried about it anymore!


The Rumor I Feared That Turned Out to Be True

Ethiopia's Ministry of Women's Affairs (MOWA) offices unexpectedly closed late last week for at least 2 weeks. This was BAD news because we've been waiting for the new MOWA office in Nazret to write a letter for us so that we can be assigned a court date. What made it worse is that the courts have historically closed for August and September during Ethiopia's rainy season. That meant that we had a much shorter window in which to be assigned a court date and pass court before court closed. If we didn't pass before court closed, we'd be looking at an October court date which meant that we'd likely be traveling in DECEMBER (instead of September or October).

The Good News From Late Last Week

Our agency has confirmed that, finally, some letters have been written by the new MOWA office in Nazret (before it closed unexpectedly for a couple weeks). This is VERY GOOD news because these were the very first letters ever written from this office and that means that progress is being made! We are likely near the top of their letter-writing list. That said, our agency cannot tell us whether or not our children's letters are among those already written. This gives us a better chance at passing court before it closes.

The Good Nearly-Confirmed Rumor

There is a new rumor going around that the courts are not going to close for the month of August (they usually close in August and September). Some say that our agency has confirmed it, but I haven't heard it directly from them yet. This is EXTREMELY GOOD news, especially when coupled with the news that the new MOWA office in Nazret is finally writing letters. This means that hope has returned for us to travel sometime in September or October. The sooner, the better!


So, hopefully, we'll have a court date before too long! Please keep sending good vibes our way... We still need them!

I Hate Rumors!

I especially hate rumors when the truth might not be working in our favor... A rumor is spreading like wildfire in Ethiopian adoption circles today. I'm not going to go into the details of it here because it isn't confirmed yet by our agency. I'm waiting for a call back from them. Suffice it to say, that if it IS true, this is BAD NEWS for us. It would likely delay our process significantly (by at least a few months). I guess the silver lining is that our match with our children isn't in jeopardy. Still, PLEASE let the rumor NOT be true!

All the Way from Jacksonville, Introducing Miss Michelle!

No, we didn't name her. This is the given name of this mannekin with beautiful natural African hair. Chris from Sally's Beauty Supply in Minneapolis looked long and far for her. She isn't available in any of the local stores, so she had to be ordered. After searching for a couple of days, he found her... in Jacksonville! She arrived in Minneapolis couple days ago. :) We look forward to practicing lots of hairstyles on her before we practice on our girls!

Caring for our children's curly and natural African hair will be very different than caring for our straight Caucasian hair, so we've been trying to learn as much as we can by:

* checking out African hair care classes! My favorite classes were with the African American Adoption Agency, at the Minnesota Adoption Resource Network's annual conference, and during Ethiopians for Ethiopians classes.

* reading books! The three that rise to the top are "Kinki Kreations", "Kids Talk Hair", and "It's All Good Hair".

* buying children's books that positively portray natural African hair. My favorites are "I Love My Hair!" and "Bippity Bop Barbershop".

* watching YouTube videos! Katelynlyn has some AMAZING videos that show how to do a variety of hairstyles, including cornrows, twists, veil-style, piggy-back braids, and many others!

* choosing products we want to start with. Given lots of recommendations, we've decided to start with the KeraCare line of products.

* discovering salons, barber shops, and hair care supply stores that cater to people with natural African hair. Too many to list here!

We're excited about applying what we've learned to the beautiful hair of each of our kids! Here are some of our very first attempts with Miss Michelle:


Hairstyle #1: Flat Twists in the Front, Hanging Twists in the Back

Hairstyle #2: Four Pony Tails with Hanging Twists, Flat Twist in the Front

So those are are very first attempts! It takes us a LONG time to do this, but hopefully with practice, we'll get a little faster and more skilled. :)

To any veteran hairstylists out there who might be reading this, feel free to give any tips or hints!!!

No News, but Still Hopeful

Just a quick note to say that we still don't have a court date. To our knowledge, the letter has not yet materialized either.

That said, without guarantees, our agency is suggesting that we should feel hopeful for at least another few days... Please keep "visualizing" for us!!

Even if we don't pass court in time for court closure (from early August to early October), We KNOW this is going to happen eventually. The one thing we know for certain is that these three little ones ARE our children. :)

Got a Minute?

Another letter-waiting family recently shared one of their daily routines with me. Jeremy and I are going to try it as well. Will you join us?

A Daily Guided Visualization

"Take a moment to imagine the MOWA Office in Nazret, Ethiopia. Visualize people coming into work. They pick up files that have been waiting for them for weeks. The first is the file of a little boy [our friends' child - they've been waiting for this letter longer than we have]. A staff member writes a letter for their little boy and then looks to the next file. It's for three siblings [our kids!]. They write the letter (or is it letters?) for our little ones. Finally, they make sure that the letters go to wherever they need to go so that the kids are assigned court dates as quickly as possible!"

Hey, it can't hurt, right? :)

Still Waiting for a Court Date...

Lately, the wait for a court date assignment has been really hard on me (Sarah). We are still waiting for the child welfare authority's new office to get up and running in Nazret (where our children are), and there is still no timeline for that right now. We do know that the office is physically established, but as of last Monday (the last day we were updated), there was still no staff working in the office. All we need is a single letter from this new office so that we can be assigned a court date!

Once we pass through court in Ethiopia, Jeremy and I will officially be the children's parents according to the Ethiopian government, and nothing will be able to reverse that. I can't wait for that date to come!

Some families who were matched with their kids after us (their kids are in a different region of Ethiopia) have court dates in a few days and we don't even have one scheduled yet... I'm happy for those families, but I'm sad for ours. Sometimes I'm wondering if this is even going to happen at all!

Even though I know that there is a 99% chance that this adoption will go through (my estimate, not the agency's), that 1% possibility of it not happening has been getting to me in the past week. Usually, I am a very hopeful person, but I haven't been feeling that way recently.

Anyway, here's to hoping that we hear some good news this week!

Redefining "Unpredictable"

Lately when people ask when we'll travel to bring our kids home, we've been saying something like, "We're not really sure, but we're estimating sometime in late July or August. It's really unpredictable." Yesterday, we learned that the unpredictability of our travel date is even MORE unpredictable than we originally thought.

Since we accepted the referral of our 3 little ones, we have been waiting for a court date in Ethiopia that would grant us parental rights to the children. We don't have to be present for that court date, but it needs to happen before we get a birth certificate for each of the children. And the birth certificates need to be issued before we can receive a travel date.

Often, the court dates are assigned (but not yet heard) about a month after a family accepts the referral. Because we are in that timeframe right now, I recently emailed our agency to inquiry about our status in being assigned a court date. This was the response:

"We are still waiting for one final document to be issued by the government authorities in Nazret before the staff in Ethiopia will be able to submit your case to the court registrar in Addis Ababa. The responsibility for child and family welfare in the Oromia Region [where our children are] is currently being shifted from one organization (MOLSA) to another (MOWA). A new MOWA office is being opened in Nazret, but it not up and running yet. At this point we are not sure how much longer it will be before we have the final document, but we remain confident that it will come from the MOWA office in Nazret as soon as the new office logistics are worked out. We will continue to be in contact with the staff in Ethiopia about this situation and will let you know if we learn more information about what timeline to expect."

This is further complicated by the fact that Ethiopia's courts close in early August. So, if we don't pass court before then, we'll be waiting another 3-4 months before a court date can even be assigned.

The question that this brings up is: Will we travel this summer or do we have to wait until the winter to bring our children home?

Obviously, we want to bring our children home as soon as possible, but so far, we're handling the news okay. We knew that by accepting a referral of children in this new-to-our-agency orphanage, we might have some extra bumps in our road. This is one of them. Our children are in Nazret, so we'll do whatever we need to do to bring them home!

A Little Step Closer...

We received our revised I-171H in the mail today! (That's the short story. If you want more details about what that means, read below.)

So, what does that mean? Some of you know that in addition to getting the "approval" of our adoption agency to adopt, we also needed to get the approval of U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS). We completed our first round of paperwork for that purpose back in July 2008, and received our initial approval (called a I-171H) in August. Our initial approval was for 1-2 children from 0-6 years old. This is directly related to the approval from our adoption agency.

At the time, we didn't even know that sibling groups of 3 nor children over the age of 6 were waiting to be matched through our agency's Ethiopia program. Of course, when we discovered that we have 3 children from 2.5-8.5 years old waiting for us in Ethiopia, we knew that this paperwork needed to be updated.

Updating the paperwork is not a quick process. First, we needed to meet with our adoption agency social worker and explain to her why we were interested in adopting 3 children at once and why we were interested in adopting a child over the age of 6. (Binyam and Helen are under 6, but Hirut's 8.5 years old.) We had to explain how we had prepared for the adoption of these children, what resources we had to help us (because "it takes a village to raise 3 older adopted children"), and how we planned to take care of ourselves and our marriage when the kids came home.

Then, about a week later, our case was submitted to the "older child adoption committee" at our agency for final approval of the changes to our age range and number of siblings. Evidently, they agreed with our social worker that we are as prepared as we can be to adopt 3 older children simultaneously. As much as I understand the need to ensure that children are joining well-prepared families and going to good homes, it's hard not to feel a little resentful of this process when you're going through it. That said, it's an amazing feeling to have gone through all of this process and have others affirm what we already thought was true: Though it's going to be a challenging experience, WE CAN DO THIS! :) More than that, we WANT to!

So, anyway, after all of that, our social worker updated our paperwork to submit to USCIS. And TODAY, we received our revised approval from USCIS in the mail.

This approval brings us one small step closer to meeting our children. Now, we just need a court date!

The Care Packages Are On Their Way!

Just a quick note to say that we have finished putting together the care packages for each of the kids (complete with toys and photo albums of us and our home). Yay! Though we're not sure exactly when our children will receive the care packages, we're excited that they are on their way!

Our Next Steps...

Thanks everyone for the well-wishes! Your support means so much to us!

So, not surprisingly, we've gotten a lot of questions since we've been matched with Hirut, Helen, and Binyam. Here's our first attempt at answering some of them!

Where are the children now? Do they know about the adoption?

Right now, the three sweet little ones are in an orphanage in the city of Nazret in the region of Oromiya in the country of Ethiopia. (Note to the Googlers among you: Nazret is also known as Nazareth and Adama.) The children know about adoption in general but don't know anything about us specifically yet. Right now, we're preparing a care package for each child to introduce ourselves, our home, and our pets. We want to get these to them as soon as possible!

Why are they being placed for adoption?

The story of how the children were placed for adoption and what happened within their birth family is private and personal. We’ve decided not to share that information at this point in time. This is sacred information to an adopted child, and we want to be sensitive to our children's needs. We will be open and honest with our children about their adoption story (those parts that they may not yet know or understand), but it will ultimately be up to them as to whether or not they want to share parts of their story and with whom. If, in the future, any of the children ask you questions that you can't answer, simply tell them to ask us. Thank you, in advance, for understanding!

So, why can't you pick them up now?

The answer is because there is still too much to do! These are the next big steps for our process:

• Right now, we are waiting for a court date in Ethiopia. Jeremy and I do not have to be present at the hearing. Usually, the court date happens 2-3 months after referral acceptance.
• On the court date, either a decision is made by the judges or a new court date is scheduled. When the decision to grant us the parental rights is made, we are legally the parents of the children according to the Ethiopian government. At that point (and not until then), we can also post photos of the children on our blog!
• Then, we wait for the Ethiopian birth certificates to be issued for each of the children, with us named as the parents.
• Once the birth certificates have been issued and are correct, we will find out our travel date. Usually, families get about 3-4 weeks advance notice before traveling.
• According to our adoption agency, we will probably travel to Ethiopia sometime between late July and late August to meet our children for the first time and to bring them home. The required length of travel is about 9 days, but Jeremy and I are hoping to travel a bit within Ethiopia beforehand as well.
• Then, we'll come home... More information about that to come later!

Well, I think that's enough for now. Let us know if you have any other questions :)

Hirut, Helen, and Binyam!!!

Jeremy and I are excited to announce that we have been matched with our children! Today, we officially accepted the referral of a sibling group of three from Ethiopia. Yes, THREE! We have 2 daughters and a son! We can't post photos via internet until we pass court in Ethiopia (in a few months), but we can show you photos in person (if you are nearby)! Of course, I'm biased, but they're absolutely ADORABLE! All three have beautiful eyes and smiles!


Here's a bit about each of our children:

Hirut is the eldest girl at 8.5 years old. She is described as friendly and energetic. Hirut likes school, drawing, animals, and playing hide-and-seek. Her favorite school subjects are math and English.

Helen, also a girl, is the middle child and is 5.5 years old. She is described as very affectionate. Helen likes to color, draw, run, and talk. She asks a lot of questions.

Binyam is our little boy. He is 2.5 years old. He is described as a very sweet, loving, and calm boy. Binyam is very shy. He loves to run.


As you can imagine, we are EXCITED beyond belief. We don't yet know when we will travel to Ethiopia to pick them up, but our best guess is August or September (if everything goes smoothly!). We will keep you updated here of any new happenings!

We're soooo excited!!! :)

"There is No Me Without You"

One of my favorite books that I have read in preparation for our adoption is called "There is No Me Without You" by Melissa Fay Greene. The book skillfully infuses narrative, modern history and statistics on Ethiopia, and cultural knowledge. In the book's pages, I also recognize much of my trip to Ethiopia, back in November 2005.

From the back cover:

In this powerful and highly acclaimed book, award-winning journalist Melissa Fay Greene tells the story of Haregewoin Teferra, a middle-class Ethiopian woman who found herself at the heart of a global health crisis. After the loss of her husband and daughter, Teferra reluctantly agreed to take in two of Addis Ababa's thousands of AIDS orphans, and soon children of all ages began to appear at the door of her tin-walled compound. There is No Me Without You is the story of how Teferra transformed her home into an orphanage and began facilitating adoptions to homes all over the world. At heart, it is a book about children and parents, wherever they may be, however they may find each other.

Here's a link to learn more about the book: http://www.thereisnomewithoutyou.com/

Even though it's been months since I've read the book, I've been thinking a lot about it lately. In part, I've been thinking about it because I want to read it again. In part, I've been thinking about it because I have learned that Haregewoin Teferra recently passed away after a short illness. She was an incredible woman with an inspiring story and a long-lasting legacy.

So, if you are looking for a good book to read, this should be your next one!

Our First Ethiopian Potluck!

Jeremy and I attended our first Ethiopian potluck yesterday. It was hosted by Ethiopians for Ethiopians, and included judging of the food by a local Ethiopian chef! We decided to make "Misr Wot" (MISS-ER WAHT) or Spicy Red Lentil Stew because it's one of our favorite dishes. For our first attempt at making it, I was pleased that it turned out so well!

Misr Wot is usually served with injera (IN-JEER-AH), a spongy, slightly sour, pancake-like bread that is used to pick up the stew. Injera is the "silverware" in Ethiopian food, and should be held and eaten from only the right hand to be polite. This is a restaurant picture of Misr Wot and other dishes on a piece of injera. Rolls of injera are also served on the side.

To make our Misr Wot, the ingredients included: red lentils, nitr kebe (NIT-ER KEH-BAY - an Ethiopian spiced butter), bebere (BAYR-BAIR-AY - a Ethiopian spice mixture), garlic, onions, jalapenos, tomatoes, and kosher salt.

To make the dish, the onions were chopped finely and sweated (cooked over the stove with salt on medium low without oil) for about 30 minutes. While that was happening, I diced the garlic, cored and chopped the tomatoes, and "stabbed" the jalapenos. After about 30 minutes of sweating the onions, I stirred 3 Tablespoons of kebe into the onions and added the garlic, stirring until fragrant (about 30 seconds). Then, it was time to add 2 cups of well-rinsed lentils, the tomatoes, 2 Tablespoons of bebere, and the 3 stabbed jalapenos. I stirred it and had it simmering, uncovered, for over an hour (until thick). To add the finishing touches, I mixed in another 3 1/2 Tablespoons of bebere and lots of salt.

This is our finished product:

Here's a somewhat blurry pic of the Ethiopian chef sampling our dish!

So, we didn't win any prizes, but we got this nice certificate!

Overall, we enjoyed ourselves! And now we have more confidence in our abilities to make Ethiopian food at home too. If anyone wants to join us for Ethiopian food sometime, let us know!

A Sneak Peek...

Some of you know that before I (Sarah) dive into to new situations, I tend to do a lot of research – and by that I mean… a lot of research! Our adoption, not surprisingly, is no exception.

Jeremy and I have attended trainings, classes, support groups, and webinars about adoption. We’ve talked to lots and lots of adoptive parents who are already home with their children. We’ve visited and bookmarked lots and lots of websites. We’ve read lots and lots of books. Here’s a picture of the adoption and parenting library we’ve started at our house.

Over the past year or so, I’ve read almost all of the books in this library. We also continually adding to it. In fact, we just received a new shipment of books from amazon.com this afternoon!

While we wait for our children to come home over the next few months, we’re going to share a bit about what we’ve learned in conducting our “literature review” of adoptive parenting.

Of course, in some ways, parenting an adopted child is the same as parenting any child. The biggest thing we’ve learned in all of this research, however, is that parenting a child who is adopted is also different than parenting a biological child. Over the next few months, we will share what makes adoptive parenting different, because it is different.

Here’s a sneak peek at some of the many topics we will touch on in future blog entries:

* Our On-Going Adoption Process. We’re waiting for our referral right now. Once our referral arrives, there’s still a lot more to do! Then we will be waiting for a court date in Ethiopia, waiting for birth certificates, waiting for travel dates, waiting to travel, and of course, waiting to bring our children home! We’ll keep you posted here on any new major developments.

* Ethiopian Culture & Language. Jeremy and I have been learning a lot about Ethiopia, its culture and its languages in the past few months. We’ll share some of what we’ve learned with you - the food, the music, some of the traditions, and some key words in the Amharic language! Let me know if you have any requests.

* Attachment. Few concepts are addressed more in adoptive parenting literature and workshops than attachment. This is about more than just bonding between a parent and a child. Despite the controversy over attachment parenting in biological parenting circles, attachment parenting is not considered controversial in adoptive parenting circles; it’s considered crucial. Find out why attachment is so important to our future children, and what you can do to help!

* Transracial and Transcultural Parenting. When our children come home, we will become a multiracial and multicultural family. Our children will be of African descent and we will be their White parents. This will have direct implications on how we raise our children. More details to come!

* Coping with Loss & Grief. Despite the excitement we have about becoming parents, in adoption, grief and loss come with the territory. At the minimum, our children will come to us having experienced the loss of their birth family, their birth culture, and their birth language. Nothing we can do will ever be able to make up for these losses. Love is not enough. Culture and language classes will never make up for the loss of being able to grow up in their birth country. Our job as parents is not to erase the losses (because it’s not possible), but to help our children to cope and work through their grief so that they discover their strength and resilience. More to come on this topic another day!

* Older Child Adoption. Because we are waiting for siblings 0-5 years old, our children will likely be “older”. At our adoption agency, additional training is required to adopt an older child (over the age of 12 months, according to our agency). Find out what all the fuss is about!

* Post-Adoption Depression Syndrome. I assure you that I did not make this up. This is a true syndrome that many, many adoptive parents face when they come home. I want you all to know about it, so that if we experience it when we come home, you can help us overcome it!


Well, that’s the sneak preview. We’ll try to update this blog about once a week or so. If you are curious about anything else that isn’t mentioned here, let us know. We’re taking requests!

1 Year Ago Today...

One year ago today, we submitted our application to Children's Home Society and Family Services (our adoption agency). So much has happened since then!!! Here's just a brief glance at some of the adoption-related things we've been up to since February 22, 2008...

• switched our focus from domestic infant open adoption to Ethiopian adoption. There's a long story about that one. Ask me if you're curious!
• increased our preferred age range from requesting siblings 0-3 years to requesting siblings 0-5 years old! :)
• attended Ethiopians for Ethiopians programs in the Fall and Winter sessions (well, truth be told the Winter session ends in 2 weeks). Through those classes, we learned some Amharic (a major language in Ethiopia) and learned more about Ethiopian culture, food, and hair care. We also started to build relationships with local Ethiopians. We plan to attend the Spring session as well. Sarah is even getting involved with some of the program development of the organization as a volunteer!
• participated in some Ethiopian cultural events: Meskel at Lake Phalen and a Literary Art Event for the Ethiopian community at Augsburg College! We also celebrated Kwanzaa (a holiday celebrating African cultural heritage) for the first time ever this past year.
• participated in Ethiopian Kids Community (EKC) events, including the Summer Mehaber, a Mom's Night Out, and an event for Ethiopia Reads.
• learned about Oromo traditional religion (Oromo is one of Ethiopia's many ethnic groups) at a class led by a woman of Oromo descent.
• read lots (and lots!) of books on topics such as Ethiopia's AIDs crisis, attachment (more on this to come another day), transracial and transcultural adoption, helping our kids cope with the grief and loss inherent in adoption, and lots more!
• bought a children's book for every month of our wait since we submitted our application to CHSFS.
• added contemporary, traditional and children-focused Ethiopian music to our ipods and listen to it often.
• learned more about hair and skin care for people of African descent in three separate workshops.
• participated in the CHSFS Ethiopia Online Forum (see link at the right), attended CHSFS Webinars (Ethiopian Culture, Adoption Rituals and Ceremonies), attended the CHSFS Waiting Family Support Group.
• visited restaurants and markets to find Ethiopian foods and other goods: Addis Markets in both cities, Seward Co-op (tasty Ethiopian food and injera!), Fasika, Dukem, etc. We have also attempted to make Ethiopian food at home, but need more practice :)
• kept up with a journal related to our adoption
• welcomed the arrival of a newborn baby nephew almost 5 months ago! We've been learning baby care techniques as a result :)
  

We're always looking for new ways to prepare ourselves for the eventual arrival of our little ones. Many experienced parents have told us that we will never feel ready... That's probably true, but it is certainly fun to do all of this stuff. We think about our kids in Ethiopia on a daily basis, and we don't even know who they are yet!